How To Fix A Broken Marriage When You’re Separated

When a couple is having serious marital problems, it is can be useful for them to spend some time apart. Separation allows the couple to take a break from the highly emotional situation and evaluate their problems objectively.

However, being apart makes it more difficult for the couple to collaborate and figure out how to fix a broken marriage. There are many couples that go into separation with all the best intentions only to end up divorced. Thankfully, there are some things that a couple can do to keep the whole thing from spiraling out of control.

Positive Attitude

A person’s attitude towards separation can become a self fulfilling prophesy. If they see separation as the first step to an inevitable divorce, chances are that they will end up divorced. However, if they see it as a chance to take an emotional breather so that they can be more objective about the situation, they are more likely to end up back together.

Open and Productive Communication

A broken marriage can only be fixed if communication in marriage remains open and productive. When a couple is separated, it can be very tempting to “ignore” or blame each other for the separation, which only makes the situation worse.

All communication during separation should be directed towards problem solving. At that point it is a very bad idea to keep having an ego-driven power struggle just to point out each other’s mistakes. It is better to let it go for the greater good.

Renegotiate the Marriage

Being separated is a clear sign that something in the marriage isn’t working and needs to be renegotiated. The current configuration may have worked for many years but it doesn’t work now because the two of you have grown and changed.

Renegotiating a marriage means bringing all grievances to the table and examining old habits that are no longer beneficial. It also means pointing out unspoken agreements that may have been agreed to unconsciously.

Being separated can make it difficult for a couple to work together and figure out how to fix a broken marriage. However, maintaining a positive attitude, keeping communication open and productive and being willing to renegotiate the marriage can make things a lot easier. By Mike Tucker